So I have always been impressed by Taylor Swift. Particularly her songwriting skills while related to her age. She is poignant and vulnerable and in touch with her emotions – a skill a lot of adults who come to therapy are often struggling to achieve. As the mother of a young girl, I also find her to be a decent role model to whom I don’t mind my daughter listening or watching.
Recently, some lyrics of Miss Swift’s struck me:
Don’t you worry your pretty little mind
People throw rocks at things that shine
And life makes love look hard
I imagine with all the flack Miss Swift receives for “who she is dating this week”, lyrics like this came naturally to her and I think she is spot on. She does shine – brightly!! and for some reason a great majority of us are threatened by her success, her fame, and/or her fortune and therefore, get the idea it is our place to judge her love life.
As a marriage therapist I’m here to say – good on you Miss Swift for dating as many people as you’d like! You are young and it sure is my experience that some married couples struggle with all the time they didn’t have to date because they “locked in” on one person too soon.
Now this is not to say that couples who married young and are struggling in this area cannot work – just that I think the uninvited jury of tabloid mags may have something to learn from Miss Swift enjoying her youth and her experience!
In my humble opinion I think it is better to have fun and try “in love” as many times as you can while you are young rather than regret you did not have the opportunity and risk resentment, regret and bitterness when you are older and married.
Life [DOES] make love look hard!
But I think mature love at its best is accompanied by equal parts joy and heartbreak from our youth. Shine On Miss Swift, Shine On!
- Lyrics by Taylor Swift, from “Speak Now” 2010
Amy M Price, LMFT 